Devine Emotion
by Alice-Jaspers Girl
Summary: Holding her hand was a key. Not only to open a new door to a new life for this monster I was, but a key to open chances for myself, and finally, a key to lock myself into this amazing world named Mary Alice.
1. And the Story Starts

JPOV

_A thousand stars may cause eyes to wander and see a meaning in light. But those same stars above us, are mocking me. They make my arms reach up to the night sky and pull and tug a black emptiness that is unconquerable; no meaning, just scattered flames of fury sent to set the night sky alive by some greater power. The stars taunt, they laugh…causing me too long for something out of my reach. But, that's life._

The rain had begun to pour from the sky, it was pounding the pavement below my feet, and hitting my head, slowly dripping down my face, and drenching my clothes. I had no umbrella… and I looked more suspicious then a penguin at a rodeo. I gouged people's reactions towards the rain…some people ran into stores, while others danced, spinning in circles, letting themselves loose, and slowly falling into the arms of loved ones. Then there were those who had the mental intelligence to bring an umbrella… well, what option have I? Shall I dance? Skip around in circles, squealing in delight as the water tickles my legs, jumping in puddles… sure… then I could become a princess… not happening. But, I had no umbrella, so the only reasonable option for me was to take cover in a store.

I walked down the nearly empty streets, taking in the scenery. I had to admit, it was beautiful. The sky was a deep blue, and the rain made it look as though I was floating in the ocean, just below the surface…looking at the watered and distorted sky above. The stars were little gold fish. Floating around me…laughing and playing in the water. I could hear voices in the distance, and they were getting closer. Two people...a man…and a women…I would guess by the sound of her laugh that the women was no older then 20, the man no more than 24.i could sense they were happy. Overjoyed... They wouldn't be that happy if I killed them. I most certainly had the strength, no doubt about it. But what good would it do me to become discovered simply over my uncontrollable bloodlust. My throat ached, and my animalistic instincts took me over. But, I had to resist. It was too public. I would wait for the rain to slow, and I would hunt, though it pained me.

I walked down the faded sidewalk, half under the eaves from closed stores. It was just past 10 pm, and all hopes of coverage were now closing down. I scanned the area… a record store…closed. A women's department store? Open, but too public for my liking. I would surely lose control. Philly's Diner…Sounded promising… I looked at the parking lot, expecting it to still be half full, as the lights were on, and I could feel the movement of blood. Surprisingly, it was half empty. Lucky me.

"Com'on Jasper," I said to myself "Let's go get some dinner." I picked up my pace slightly, trying to look as though rain was a bother to me. I stopped at the door, to tilt my hat (covering my coal colored eyes). I pulled the door open, and a bell chimed.

A young waitress turned in my direction, smiled, and walked towards me.

"Howdy there Cowboy…" she said as she laughed quietly.

I nodded, not interested in her human games whatsoever. He blood smelt slightly of alcohol, and I had to wonder if her sober self would be this intrigued by a good ol' fashioned Texan cowboy. "Just one." I tried to hide my southern drawl, but it slipped out…she smiled, but gave me a quizzical look, but I ignored it. She shrugged, and led me to a booth in the corner, handing me a menu. "Chocolate Shake..." was all I said, handing her back the menu. It was the classic diner food, so I thought. She smiled, and walked over to the bar, to tell the chef. She wiggled her hips as she walked, and it irritated me. Why were humans always either dull, or hormone driven nowadays? I got my shake within two minutes, and the waitress left quickly, sensing my annoyance. I watched as she sat in a chair behind the counter, pouting. How pitiful…An older waitress walked over to her, handing her a glass of water. The younger worker pointed over at me, and the older waitress' mouth dropped… she ran over to the telephone and started talking quickly into the receiver.

A very tired little girl and a young father sat down in the booth in front of me. She demanded candy, and the dad laughed, denying her the simple treat. I had to hold my breath. She was a temptation… And way too young to die.

As I was looking out the window on my left, the front door's bell chimed, and a scent unlike none other hit me as hard as a bullet… Vampire. I flinched...Stay calm Jasper…

"Hey there Lil' Mary!" a female worker walked over to the source of the scent, and I turned to look as well… I looked away quickly. But I saw what I needed. A tiny figure, sickly skinny, under 5 feet tall, with dark auburn hair waving to her waist. She resembled a fairytale character…some little fairy from a brother's grim tale. Her skin was white. She was Vampire. She was…well...she was…what was she? She was… well…wow. I blinked…I couldn't control my own emotions for once in my life. The older waitress leaned over the counter to talk to the tiny female…and then smiled and pointed in my direction…she hopped off of her bar stool, heading in my direction. I had to leave, now. I was intruding in on her territory… I stood, up grabbed my coat, my hat, and my wallet (leaving money for the Shake) and headed for the door.

"Wait!" a tiny whimsical, musical, magical, wonderful voice called to me… I had to turn. The temptation was overflowing, and it was driving me crazy… I had also been standing there, completely still for almost a minute now…

"Please..." it said. I turned and the most elegant creature, clearly an angel was standing there, making this ordinary everyday diner seem as though it was a museum, holding the most captivating sculpture in the world. The room glowed; I was not sure if it was my imagination, or if this little lady actually had that effect on me. I was in heaven. Then, she smiled… and I was overwhelmed, intoxicated. I gasped, and blinked… her milky white teeth were sharp (like any Vampire), but it wasn't her perfect teeth sent me A-wire… it was her lips… the way they had turned slightly upwards, the way the bright red color was most definitely natural… the way her beautifully full, luscious lips sneaked themselves into a heart shuttering smile, that sent my no-existent, not beating heart a flutter. It moved… I'm sure it did. I have not felt that in over a lifetime… literally. My face had its own reaction, and I pulled out my own (embarrassing) Boyish grin.

She giggled…This girl, excuse me, women just kept on getting better… a giggle… simple…yet beautiful… music to my ears… the little boy inside me was showing threw as if she was my biggest childhood crush, and I could tell this person-this outstanding, amazing, brilliant person-had a young soul. I wanted to join in with her laughter... the only problem was that I had no idea who this person was, let alone why they were laughing at me.

She then caught on to my confusion, and cleared her throat. I was tempted to look into her eyes, but I would have drowned. Fell to the floor, in a state of shock. I never believed this was possible...a girl? In _my _life? Impossible. I had vowed to never love, or let myself be loved. I could not. I was a monster. Maria had trained me to kill. I was a weapon of mass destruction. I was her personal puppet trained to follow orders. I Jasper Whitlock was a murderer.

"You…You have kept me waiting a long time…" it wasn't an accusation, but a fact. She was simply stating this. But, I still felt the need to apologize.

"I'm sorry ma'am..." my accent was as thick as marmalade and she smiled, giggling slightly at my silly accent. So I decided to add to the Jasper Whitlock Texas charm, tilting my hat. I was highly confused at this point. Did I know this woman? I had no recollection of her face, and she did not have one of those faces that you could simply pass by…

"No need to apologize…you did nothing wrong. The fault is mine." She moved forwards, and her shoes clicked as they hit the tiles on the floor… I then noticed her wardrobe… I started at the very top of her head, her hair… it was beautiful… I could sit there for hours playing with her hair… I avoided her face, still afraid to meet her eyes. I took in her dress. Simplicity is truly the most amazing revolution in this world might I add. I had seen some pretty insane dresses, but not on this little Fairy. Her dress had a scoop neckline, and it rested just off of her shoulders, presenting her cream completion. It was black, and slightly poofed at the bottom, coming to an end just inches above her knees…as my eyes traced down her legs, I couldn't help but stare… how could someone so small, have such long legs? Her shoes were unexpectedly bright red, and added at least 5 inches to her height…how short was she? I had to clear my throat, before I responded, and quickly. I was raised differently… I was taught to enjoy the banquet but resist the wine, so to speak. And I believe I had just been caught starring… how rude of me.

"Ma'am, I am terribly sorry, but I have the feeling I could never put you to blame…" she was now standing centimeters away from me, the height of her head barely reaching the top of my chest. I had to look down as I talked to her, but I did not find this to be a bother, as long as she was the one I was looking down too. I laughed at my mental joke, and I got a strange look from the little angel…

"Are you laughing at me? I thought you were more of a good ol' southern gentleman than that Jasper…"

"No Little Miss, I was simply laughing at my own self… I would never be so rude as too... wait… how do you know my name?"

"We best sit down." She motioned towards my booth from earlier, and I headed in that direction, but she did not follow…

"Ma'am? Are you okay?" I was worried, her little face was scrunched up, and she seemed as though she was day dreaming…she shook herself out of her trance, but stayed in place.

"I am fine… one moment, I'll just ask Eliza for the keys; we might be here for awhile… I would need to lock up.

After returning from the kitchen, the tiny creature entranced me with her grace as she walked across the room, and sat directly across from me.

"Now, I believe some much needed explanations are in order, do you agree?" she smiled, and if my heart had been beating, after her smile it would have returned to its present state, unbeating. Completely frozen in time.

I returned her smile with my own, and nodded, allowing her begin her explanation. But, nothing was said. Instead she just sat there, in a trance, staring at me… I was not in the least uncomfortable… I was finally allowed a moment to think.

Who is she? What could she possibly want from me? How did she know my name, when I had no memory of hers…we had never met; Had we? Then it hit me, hard. This feeling… this urge… this beating, fluttering, swimming excitement twisting my stomach into knots…This indescribable feeling was emanating from the beautiful lady, and it was consuming me whole… but what was it? It wasn't anger... Anger was more of a stabbing sensation… it wasn't rage, nor was it hate… then what could she possibly be feeling? What am I feeling? I need to control the fluttering in my stomach before it became an addiction… I love this feeling. I adore it. Mainly because of the person who gave it to me. I feel total adoration towards this…this un-humanly beautiful creature; and I don't even know her name…

As if she had read my mind, the elfish fairy, turned to me, and looked at my face… trying to capture my eyes with hers… I had to give in.

"Mary Alice…" was all she said.

In that instant my heat got heavier… but it was not heavy.


	2. Explanations

I looked into her golden amber eyes and they were searching my face, trying to answer some hidden question.

"Howdy Little Mrs.…Miss? Mary…" was she in a courtship? Engaged? She had no ring… did she have a mate? She most certainly did, no sensible male would leave such a beautiful, small, fragile defenseless creature to fend for herself.

"Uhm," she cleared her throat… "It's Just Mary Alice…for now." She smiled, and leaned in… was she suggesting that I could change her status? As she leaned in, a slight breeze floated in from the window, and caressed her face, carrying her scent towards me...

She...Mary Alice, smelt like cinnamon mixed with the slightest bit of French vanilla, and springtime… the sunshine… the plethora of flowers… mainly…what was that scent…Sunflowers? Yes, sunflowers. And Roses. But, the smell of cinnamon was the most intoxicating, reminding me of the delicious cinnamon buns my mother used to bake. I swear to god, sitting there, in front of this little angel, sent straight from heaven for me, I licked my lips… how inappropriate… how embarrassing.

Then she broke out in to hysterics. Mary Alice covered her mouth in a feeble attempt to stop the laughing fit, but her glorious sounds of her laughter were still heard from every corner of the now empty diner. I sunk into my chair, letting my hair cover my eyes. And she immediately stopped laughing.

"Jazz, I'm sorry…sometimes I just can't contain my laughter…" she flashed an apologetic smile, and I was perfectly fine, embarrassment far behind me.

"Jazz?"

She nodded. "Like the music," she stood up, and moved around the table, sitting beside me. "It's just something I saw in a vision, I'm sorry."

"A vision?" I scooted closer to her side, demanding an explanation.

"Shoot…," she smiled, it was only a half smile, she was upset by something… I felt the need to comfort her.

"Mary Alice, What's bothering you little Darlin'?" I reached for her hand… but I was afraid to take it in my own. I was a southern gentleman. We just don't go around to random diners, picking up women…so I slowly pulled my hand back to my lap, keeping far away enough so that I wasn't tempted.

She eyed my hands before she responded, placing the smallest pout to her lips. It was adorable, and completely irresistible. "Well first things first, Mr. Whitlock… why are you scared of me?"

Scared? Me? I laughed. "I'm not scared of you little lady, I'm scared of the big fellow who would track me down if I even thought about holdin' that perty lil' hand of yours." My accent came out, and drowned my words. It was an old nervous habit of mine, that hadn't surfaced in a while.

"I hardly doubt that you would ever attempt to beat yourself up Jasper," what? "I mean, especially if it were to be a fight over me...there is no competition other than yourself." She smiled, and shuffled closer to my side. We were almost touching now, and it frightened me. I had to stay a gentleman, but this one was most definitely trying to test my limits, every so often she would move closer, or bat her eyelashes, or gently let the skin of her arm graze across my biceps. She was feisty.

"What are you trying to tell me ma'am?"

"Well, it's quite a long story; I wouldn't want to bore you."

"I have got nothing but time sweetheart, speak on."

"Alright then." She smiled, and reached out for my arm. "You mind?"

I shook my head, confused with what she was asking, but let her continue anyhow. She slowly traced her fingers down my arm, sending an electric shock into my heart; what was she doing?

As she reached my wrist, she grabbed the black fabric of my shirt, pulling it up my arm, revealing my scars…

"These scars… they are from another vampire…many others…am I correct?"

"How did you know?"

"The other vampires… you were some form of leader to them, weren't you?"

I was hesitant, but I would answer anything truthfully to that sweet little face of hers…

"I suppose so… But Mary Alice, how did you know?"

"I spoke of visions, did I not?"

I nodded, and she traced one of my more dominant scars with a gentle finger, that sent sparks flying through my body. I never knew how amazing something as simple as touch could be… Mary Alice moved the fabric higher on my arm, letting her fingers follow the path of my scars. Her hand became greedy, moving the fabric as high as my arm would allow it, without stretching or tearing it. The feeling of her slight touch sent an aching sensation to run through my veins. My next actions were impulsive.

I grabbed her tiny hand from my arm, and placed it on the side of my neck, revealing more of my horrifying scars. She gasped slightly, and started tracing her way down to my collarbone, and under my chin. She was so small, that she could barely reach my face, so she straddled herself on my legs, one of her thighs on either side of my own. We were wrapped up in our small perfect world of emotion, and Mary Alice had definitely been affected. She slowly looked up into my eyes, and bit her bottom lip, leaving her hands on my neck. As she looked in my eyes, her hands slowly fell to the collar of my shirt, to tackle some buttons…this was too far for me. I was raised differently. I know Mary Alice was just as much of a wild animal as I was, just as dangerous, just as alone… just as scared… but we were in a diner for heaven's sake… this was inappropriate public behavior for anyone. I cleared my throat, and she came back to reality. As cold as I felt, she understood, apologized quietly, and sat beside me again.

"Continue?"

She nodded.

"Once upon a time I was a human, just as you were… not that I have any memory." She cringed, and I reached out for her hand again, this time gaining the mental strength needed to hold her tiny hand in mine.

Her hand seemed to drown in my large fist, but it did not feel wrong or uncomfortable… no, it was just the opposite. It was… well, I would say perfect, but the word was so plain compared to what it actually was...holding her hand was a key. Not only to open a new door to a new life for this monster I was, but a key to open chances for myself, and finally, a key to lock myself into this amazing world named Mary Alice.

I used my 'ability' to calm her slightly-enough for her to continue.

"Well, I woke up from a burning pain that seemed to last forever… seeing only the eternity of darkness that I remember. Not knowing what I was, who I was, or why I was in a ditch, on the side of the main road in town, covered in what seemed to be my own blood. But, the burning from my throat over powered all thoughts I had, causing me to have the urge to drink the blood off of my own body, making me crazy."

I knew that feeling…

"After a moment, I began to scream; not knowing what was happening to me…then it happened."

I leaned closer, as her voice got quieter.

"I saw this mysterious man, with eyes of coal black, hair golden and slightly curled… standing with me, telling me that he loved me, holding me close…"

Was she talking about me? How was that even remotely possible? She was lying to me…

"Jasper… I saw you. I saw us. I know, I was frightened too… but I knew that whoever I was looking for… they made me happy… wherever I was, it made me feel at home...and I wanted it Jasper, I wanted it more that blood."

"How do you know my name?" I wanted the full story from Mary Alice...I needed to know how she knew me, I wanted to know why she looked at me like that…with those eyes…those beautiful golden eyes…

"I continued seeing these random well visions of you and i. we were with others. And you were hiding me… well trying. I was climbing on you back, trying to get a better look at the strange beings… they knew us, and called us by our names… they also spoke of vampirism and our abilities…"

"What abilities?"

"Oh please Jasper, like you don't know." She laughed again, teasing me.

I just starred at her, memorizing the contours of her face, the shape of her eyes, the unique color of her lips, the rosy pink of human life that still existed somehow in her cheeks… everything about her was more perfect, more beautiful, more amazing then the face of a goddess. I shrugged, not taking my eyes off of her face.

"You…you can manipulate people's emotions… I thought you knew… you have been controlling mine for awhile now... I thought you knew…"

Oh that… "I know. I was just making sure that you knew what I knew.. you know?"

"what?"

"I have no idea what I just said..." I was mesmerized by the way her mouth moved as she talked… the way she smiled at almost every other word she said.

"That's fine.., but Jasper, I knew we would be together from the moment I saw your face. And after I had a vision of well this, I came here and have been patiently waiting…"

"I'm so terribly sorry ma'am…how long have you been waiting?"

"Well, I believe I am around the age of 19… and I woke up -so to speak -on October 15th, 1920… I saw you for the first time that day… but I didn't have the vision of tonight until… 1925. It took me almost two years to find this diner, and when I got here it was… 1927 exactly. It was new years eve."

"But, Mary Alice… its 1945 now… you have been here for 20 years?"

She nodded… how was that possible? How did she not get discovered?

"Jasper, I knew you were the dominant factor to my future, I had no option other than to wait."

I smiled... I had an idea. I could win over that little heart of hers with a simple smile, and a simple melody…


	3. May i have this dance?

"Jasper, where do you think you are going?" Mary Alice said, standing up, and following me out onto the worn down dance floor.

"I'm not going anywhere honey." As I said this I reached out towards her, and grabbed at the hem of her skirt… not that I was going to try anything…she was just too far away from me. She giggled (god, I adore that giggle. I would happily give up anything to be able to hear that precious little shimmer of hope every day of my life) and drew herself closer to me.

"Well, Jasper, what are you planning to do with me now?" she bit on her bottom lip, and walked closer to me, reaching out to my face, twirling her finger into one of my curls, placing it behind my ear… exposing my eyes.

"Nothing out of the ordinary for a gentleman I can assure you ma'am." I winked, placing my arm around her waist, dragging her with me to my destination, the jukebox. "Chose a song…" I looked into her pretty eyes, and lost myself there, not noticing the song she had chose at first. "Seriously Mary Alice?" she seemed to be disappointed, I did not want her unhappy… so, I sent a small wave of pure joy in her direction.

"You don't like this song? It is the only song I know… I don't really listen to the radio you know… Being a vampire and all…" She winked. "Because you know, I really waste my time listening to a useless piece of plastic used to play music. Not that I have free time at all… it's not like I'm wasting my time sitting in an old diner, waiting for anyone." She gave me a funny look… and I had a feeling that I haven't felt in a long time….what was it called again? Ah, yes. Sarcasm. But seriously… this song? Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy was really not what I had imagined she would choose.

"Ha-ha. You are too funny." I reached over to the jukebox, looking through their song choices… perfect. I smiled, and Mary Alice moved my arm, trying to see what I had chosen. When she saw my selection she gave me a quizzical look, testing me.

"I was thinking something maybe a little slower lil' darlin'…"

She looked at her feet… and then a wave of nervousness, embarrassment, and anxiety was flashed my way…

"What's wrong? Why are you so scared? Its only music… it won't bite… and, well... neither will I."

She gave me a sad smile. It was completely devastating to see her sad. Mary Alice moved a piece of hair away from her face, and looked at me, not in the eyes though. I wanted to make her feel better, this was supposed to make her happy…not embarrassed.

"Well, Jasper… I told you I don't remember being human," I nodded; I remembered every word she had said, every move she had made, everything. "Well, no one taught me how to dance once I was a vampire and I…" I laughed. I didn't mean to be rude, but was that her only worry? Such a small thing to be sad about, I was expecting rejection, not bad dancing skills; that, I could handle. I raised an eyebrow at her, and gave her a soft smile.

"Don't worry Milady. I think I have that under control." She was about to speak, but before she could, I pressed 'select' on the machine, and my song started playing. The song was I'm Confessin' sung by Perry Como. It was a good song, and I felt that it shared my… feelings well. Not that I loved this strange girl. Just that I wanted there to be some potential there… I wanted her to know that I could love her… but, I wouldn't honestly know if I did… I don't remember what love felt like… all I know is hate, and lies.

I knew all the words to this song… but, it would be odd. Her never hearing the song in her life, not knowing me... trusting me with my dancing skills to make up for hers… and then I go acting like a total idiot in front of her, singing… not going to happen. So, instead of singing, I took Mary Alice by the waist, and carefully picked her up a bit, placing her back down on my feet.

"What are you doing Jasper?" she was trying her hardest to be serious, but I could see (and feel) the happiness radiating off of herself. Being close to me must have been just as good of a feeling for her as it was for me.

"I'm teaching you how to dance. It's actually very simple... All I'm going to ask you to do is let me take control and to…" I blanked out… this was going to be hard for me to get used to. I was going to say trust me… but no one ever had trusted me before… why would they start now?

"And to… what Jasper? And too…" she touched the side of my face, prompting me to continue.

I had to tell her… I had to ask her at least. If she didn't trust me… I could live…or whatever I am- with that. "Trust me." Her beautiful red lips puckered together, and then they opened slightly, forming a little 'o' shape… it was a cute expression… but I couldn't tell if it was a yes or a no… then she licked her lips, and smiled, nodding. She just needed a minute to think… thank the lord. I needed her trust more than anything. Not that she should trust me… but I needed a vote of confidence… someone to push me in the right direction… someone to encourage me. Maybe if I had that… or something even mildly close to that... I knew that if I had that, things would get better for me.

"Of course I trust you Jasper! Why would you think differently? If I didn't trust you… who would be left for me to believe in?" She had a point.

"I'm just warning you Darlin', I am a monster after all."

"So am I," she laughed. "And don't you trust me?" Of course I trusted her… I just couldn't admit it… trust was a form of weakness…And the last person I trusted was Maria… I gave her my complete faith and look where that had left me. She destroyed me. Maria lied to me, and made me into the disgusting, horrible killer I was today. I was getting myself back… but not enough to admit to trust again. Mary Alice had enough of a hold on me… enough information on me to take my trust from me, take everything I had… and leave… I couldn't stand that again. I know, I was the one who left Maria, but that was for my own safety. Whether this Angel was a monster or not did not matter to me. She still had the emotional and physical strength to her to hurt me.

"Yes, I know you are a 'monster' too… a very, very small one at that…"

She slapped me lightly. Playfully. It was a cute gesture. Our song was being wasted though, and I needed to dance with her before I lost my chance.

"I'm not that small…" she looked down…there I go again, hurting her feelings…

"I'm sorry Ma'am…I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

She smiled, and pressed the rewind button on the jukebox, starting the song again.

"Now, show me how to dance." She wiggled her eyebrows, and I laughed, clearing my throat.

"Well, it's simple. Just follow my movements…and let the music fill you. Let it control your movements. Just…uh…follow my footsteps."

"Yes sir!" she said, and saluted me, like I was in charge of her… it was adorable… but, I never wanted her to think I would take control of her… I never would make her do anything that she didn't want to do. I was her puppet. I was complete mush in her capable hands. I moved her closer to me, holding the small of her back, and I took one of her hands in mine… but then I realized that her other hand was just sitting there on her hip… she was really that clueless?

"Uhm..." she looked up at my face, turning away from looking at our hands. I let go of her back (reluctantly) and let my fingers slide down her arm, reaching her tiny hand. I fumbled at her wrist, trying to find her fingers, without taking my eyes off of hers. I finally got a finger… her ring finger. And I pulled her hand up by the finger, placing it on my shoulder. I looked down at her to see how she responded. She was on her tippy toes, and still straining to reach my shoulder… she was so small. So delicate. So…perfect. She shrugged her shoulders and said "I'm used to it. I don't mind. Now, please… before I die, let's dance." She emphasized 'die'.

I let out a breath, and started leading her in a small waltz. One, two, three… one, two…what am I doing? God… she has beautiful eyes… they seem to shine a beautiful gold…not the usual red I had become accustom to. I didn't mind. She was so different from everything else I knew… so why should I expect her eyes to be the same too?

"This is easier than I expected…" she looked at my face… "I think I get it…" she smiled, and hoped off of my feet. "You mind?" of course I minded! She was way too far away from me… come closer!

"No, that's fine." I smiled, and started moving to the music. She was looking down at the ground, so I let go of her back again, and tilted her head up to face me.

"the floor is a lot more boring than me," I winked. "Don't think, do. Just let the music control you. Follow my eyes. I'll lead. Don't stress Mary, I've got you. You're safe here."

Her eyes searched my face for any trace of lying, and when she decided I was being truthful; she smiled, and let her eyes lock onto mine.

She lost her footing, and it displeased her. She was a slight perfectionist I assumed…

"One, two, three…one, two, three…"

"I got it." She smiled. She tightened her grip on my hand, and pulled herself closer to me, bending her arm that was holding my shoulder. I smiled, agreeing with her silent plead for closeness, reaching further across her back, forcing her closer to me.

Soon we were spinning, and moving quickly. She caught on quickly, and we were in perfect rhythm. The music fit the mood perfect, and I knew that I would want to hold her there in my arms for…awhile. I don't care if we were dancing, or just standing there like statues. She fit into my messed up jigsaw puzzle of a life, and that's all that mattered to me.

Then, I had an epiphany. I was grateful. And not just to Mary for finding me, but for Maria... I know, that sounds odd, but it is true. Without them, I wouldn't be a vampire. I would be dead right now and this beautiful creature would have never found her way into my arms. Thanks to them, I am here. And as happy as ever. I know I had to go to hell and back for this, but I would gladly suffer a million times over just to hold her. Though, I had a feeling that from here on out, things were going to get a lot better. And I knew, I would stay at this height of happiness for as long as I was allowed. I was an instant addict.

The song slowly drifted to an end, but I wasn't ready to let go. I was perfectly content waltzing in the perfect silence. Alice didn't stop dancing, and neither did I. I was glad she felt the same.

"Jasper?"

"Yes beautiful?" I smiled at her, and moved some hair away from her captivating eyes.

"What?" Did I seriously just…say that out loud… that was inappropriate…

"I-I I am so sorry, I didn't know what I was saying, I just kind of let it slip out, and I will except any punishment, I deserve it…" I let go of her, and backed up. Into the wall…smooth

"What are you talking about…? I was just surprised…oh god, I'm sorry Jazz… I'm just shocked. I'm not normally considered beautiful…but I won't hurt you. I promise. I just wanted to ask if we could dance again…"

She wasn't mad? How is that even…remotely possible…Maria used to punish me all the time when I spoke out of line. But, the good thing was that she wanted to dance again… I did too. So I slowly made my way over to her, watching her emotions to make sure she was being serious…and to check and see if I was frightening her. I wasn't. Good… I slowly pressed the select button again, and the song began once again… Alice smiled and started humming along with the song.

If she was willing to act so freely with me... I would too. this was my all time favorite song. I knew the words… so I started singing...

_I'm confessin' that I love you . . .  
Tell me, do you love me too?  
I'm confessin' that I need you,  
Honest I do, need you every moment!  
In your eyes I read such strange things,  
But your lips deny they're true . . .  
Will your answer really change things,  
Making me blue?_

Alice moved in; closer to me, and we were soon touching. It was amazing. We were molded to the other, perfectly in sync with our steps. I stopped singing, only intent on watching her. She was what was important, not the stupid meaningless lyrics. I know, the lyrics are perfectly poetic… but Mary Alice was incomparable.

"Please… I love hearing you sing…. Continue."

I nodded, and picked up on the song.

_I'm afraid someday you'll leave me,  
Say'n can't we still be friends?  
If you go, you know you'll grieve me,  
All in life on you depends . . .  
Am I guessin' that you love me?  
Dreamin' dreams of you in vain,  
I'm confessin' that I love you,  
Over again!_

Alice stopped moving, and started humming along to the melody. Her voice was so much more pretty than Perry Como… then again…I was biased.

_I'm afraid someday you'll leave me,  
Say'n can't we still be friends?  
If you go, you know you'll grieve me,  
All in life on you depends . . .  
Am I guessin' that you love me?  
Dreamin' dreams of you in vain,  
I'm confessin' that I love you,  
Over again!_

I finished the song, and realized that Mary's head was nestled in the crook of my neck, and her eyes were closed… It looked like she was sleeping… she was so peaceful. She looked up at my face, and giggled.

"thank you for the dance kind sir.," she looked over at the clock on the wall… "But, it's getting terribly late… I must be getting back to where I am staying."

No! She couldn't leave… I wouldn't let her. Why didn't I think about that? I knew deep down that this couldn't last… Jasper, you shouldn't have gotten yourself tied in too deep… this is bad… now she is going to just leave…you have to make her stay…

"You...You can't leave Mary…"

She laughed.

"I'm just going down the road… I'm not leaving…"

I smiled, good. I was still in heaven with the prettiest angel of all…but she was still leaving in a sense… she wouldn't be in my arms… she would be out of my reach…

She walked over to the booth, and picked up a small purse I never noticed she was carrying. Mary Alice then walked over to the front doors of the diner…and stood there….frozen.

"I'll miss you Mary…" I walked over to her, and gave her a side hug.

She laughed… why? What did I do wrong?

"well, major, aren't you coming along?" she tilted her head, and walked out the door, turning to face me. "you are most certainly welcome to join me… I hope you will…"

I didn't care if it was not appropriate. I don't care if I don't know her last name… I don't care if she was going to china… I would follow her. I nodded. "but first ma'am, if you would… what is your last name?"

"Oh, of course, how rude of me…. Hello, I'm Mary Alice Brandon."

It suited her… but it didn't seem perfect. Brandon seemed to be too simple of a last name for her. She needed something more original, like herself… something like Whitlock…JASPER! Don't even think that… it was only hours after meeting her… wait… how does she know her last name? I though she didn't remember anything… I wouldn't ask her now… it was too perfect a moment.

"Major Jasper Whitlock, at your service ma'am." I tilted my hat, and walked forward meeting her, linking my arm in hers, letting her guide me into the dark, not knowing where I was going.

**MORE COMMENTS= MORE STORY= HAPPY ME! :) :) :D and happy you ;) **

**P.S JASPER LOVES YOU! **

**do u like it?**

**what do u want to happen next :O **

**lol not that i dont have ideas...**


	4. Its called Love

_**SORRY ITS SO SHORT!**_

_**i just wanted to get this out :) **_

JPOV _**  
**_

As we walked, Mary Alice started skipping a little, and it was quite awkward trying to hold her arm as she was being so jittery; So, I happily let her go, intent on watching her every move, and scooping her up once again as soon as she stopped. As soon as I let go, off she went. She was skipping, jumping around, picking up random flowers that had been drenched from the rain, and making tiny bouquets, and giving them to me as we walked. I was left with an over flowing amount of buttercups, daisies, lilies, lilac, and wild roses…along with the odd clover.

Then, she slowed down her pace, and linked her arm back in mine, taking half of the flowers.

"I love flowers…they are just like little random splatters of joy, color and hope that grow randomly from the ground… like people… they are all unique…so many different kinds of people..Growing up, shining in their own light…giving off their own rays of hope…and as soon as they have grown, they…die." She turned to me and gave me a shy smile, dropping her flowers one by one as we continued walking.

"I suppose we are the exception…" I smiled back at her, and pulled her closer to my side. I looked around, totally engulfed by the moment. Not realizing we were still on earth, we were still walking down an abandoned road in a small town. It was getting colder, not that I minded. It was warmer than usual for Early April, so the cold was expected sooner or later. The stars had multiplied from when I last saw them, and I wish I could have reached up, and grabbed a few. Giving one to the Angel beside me…and keeping one for myself, putting it in my pocket and saving it for a rainy day…

"Yes, we are..," she turned up a long driveway. "Here we are."

I turned to face a very posh looking Hotel. The lights in the main lobby were still on, but most of the rooms had their lights out. After all, it was after 11pm. It was expected for humans to be asleep so late at night… But why were we here; at a hotel? Why was she staying at a hotel? I mean, she didn't sleep…neither did I, so why were we at a hotel?

"I have to make it look like I am human, Jasper…I mean, it's not much, but it's a sign of slight humanism to have somewhere to sleep…" she laughed, and pulled me in through the front doors. She nodded to the lady at the front desk, giving her a slight smile. The ladies eyes widened slightly at the sight of me… I was used to the extra attention, and it really didn't bother me much anymore. Mary Alice then pulled me down the hall, and up the dark stairwell.

"Mary Alice, why do you make such a big deal about not being human? I mean I'm just curious… But, It's our nature… it's who we are." I didn't want to offend her, I just wanted to know. I was 'raised' being told that vampires are superior to humans, and we deserved more.

"Jasper, don't you want to be normal? I mean, I sure as hell never planned on becoming a monster." She stopped at the last door on the right, and dug a tiny silver key out of her purse, opening the plain white door.

The room was nicely decorated, I suppose. I mean, it was plain, and there was absolutely no emotion put in anything that was in the room, it felt dead. Mary Alice walked into the room, throwing her purse on the table by the door as she did, taking off her shoes. Once she stood up straight with no shoes, I truly understood how…short… she was. Mary Alice was a very little monster… I couldn't even consider her a monster. She was too sweet, too nice….too special. I on the other hand, was the monster… She stopped, and turned around to face me, who was still standing in the door, confused as to what I was going to do next.

"You can come in…" she smiled, and walked over to the mirror, taking the bobby pins out of her hair, letting it fall lower down on her back. It cascaded in soft waves, framing her face almost perfectly. I wanted to touch her hair, make sure it was all real. I mean, I could be dreaming right now… I could wake up back in Maria's grasp… away from my Mary Alice. I couldn't let that happen, so I just did as she told me, and took a step forward, coming in to the room… but I stopped… I couldn't do this.

Come on Jasper, it's only a room, don't get over whelmed… its only a room…it's not like just because you walk into her room you will have to lose your virtue…and hers…wait… what if she… Had…. No. don't even think that Jasper. Just walk. Left foot, right foot…there. I was standing in the front of the room, mission accomplished. I took in a deep breath, shocked that I had been able to do this… and I smelt it. Mary Alice; she smelt amazing; the whole room smelt like her… it was overwhelming. Intoxicating. I was going to go crazy, this was insane… why did I let myself follow her home? Mary Alice walked past me, and closed the open door. Great, no fresh air to help me control myself over the scent… I held my breath.

"Jasper are you okay?" she walked over to me, and took the flowers out of my clenched fist, placing them down on her table. Only to hold my hand after wards, pulling me over to sit on her couch.

"Mary, I'm sorry. I have to leave. This isn't right… I shouldn't have come here… I will come back tomorrow morning. I promise. I know, nothing Is going to happen, but it still feels wrong…" I looked away from her face, hiding my embarrassment. Her emotions only showed confusion, but she knew of my power… she was probably hiding what she really felt.

"Oh, I'm sorry Jasper… ill come with you. We can go back outside…its probably easier for you out there anyways…less…humans…" she stood up, and walked over to go get her shoes, but I stopped her.

"Mary Alice, no. I… you…its late... I should…go…" I headed, well ran for the door, I couldn't do this. It was wrong on so many levels.

"Jasper, please. Just listen to me, I can tell you if anything is going to happen… trust me, nothing…tonight. Just stay. There is so much more I need to tell you…" she reached out and grabbed my arm, trying to pull me back into the room. She gave me a soft smile, and her eyes were pleading for me to listen to her, and just obey, walking back into the room…I knew I couldn't. I looked away quickly, and her face fell… she starred at the floor…

"No. Mary Alice. I want to, I really do… but I'm sorry, I'm just not…ready…it's too early... I will come back tomorrow, I just need to think. And hunt…" I lifted her chin up. I needed to see her eyes before I left.

She didn't look me in the eyes…I needed to make sure she was okay… I needed to see her beautiful face composed as a smile…once more… it was addicting, and I wouldn't be able to stay away for an entire night, knowing that I left her unhappy.

"Mary… I'm sorry…"

She shrugged. "I understand where you are coming from..." she looked me in the eyes, and smiled. Finally. There was the smile I wanted. It didn't reach her eyes though, and I knew she was acting… she was sad… not that I wasn't. This was horrible… I didn't want to leave at all. But I knew what was right. I knew that I had to leave. So I gave her my own smile, trying to make her feel better… it didn't work so I sent a wave of peace her way, followed by a surge of happiness.

"I promise…I'll be back before you even had time to realize I was gone…" I knew this was a lie… she would know I was gone... I would feel empty away from her… and I had just met her… she had 'known' me for over 20 years… I couldn't fathom how she felt. Just getting me, and then I go…

But, she smiled, and hugged me. I loved the feeling of her body being close to mine… she radiated this heat, and it melted my heart. I had that feeling in the pit of my stomach again… the same on she had given me earlier… the fluttering…

"As long as you are here tomorrow… I have to tell you so much Jasper…" she hugged me tighter, and rested her little head on my chest.

"I'll be here." I hugged her back, and let go reluctantly. She looked me in the eyes, and I was trapped in this safe haven. She was now my everything. I was created to protect, to fight. And, now I actually had something important to fight for. She was so unprotected before me… so weak. So little. I felt so over protective of this little woman I had just met.

"One last thing before I go Mary…I have one question…" I held her tiny hand in mine, and searched her eyes, looking for any sadness, but it had disappeared.

"Anything Jasper. Ask me anything." She smiled, and raised her eyebrows.

"That feeling… the fluttering…," my other hand went down to my stomach. "In your stomach…you keep on feeling it… and, I feel it too….but…"

Her face lit up, and she smiled the biggest, brightest smile I had ever seen. It was beautiful, and brighter than the sun itself.

"Jasper, It's called love…"

_**What did you think? i like the ending :) **_

_**well, i think i might switch to APOV for a bit... what do you guys think?  
**_


	5. Visions of a Sunset

APOV.

He would come back… I had to keep telling myself that. He is coming back Mary Alice. He will come back, and he will hold you, and tell you that he loves you… he can't deny the truth forever… he will be back in this room tomorrow morning, and you will be able to explain everything. The Cullen's; Your Visions; Him and I…he would know anything he wanted to know. I felt the slightest tingle in my eyes, and I pushed it away, not allowing myself to be sad over something that will-hopefully- turn out wonderfully.

But, even if he did come back…things could change. What if… well what if right after I explained everything he ran for it… running away from what's good for him. I always knew it was going to be a challenge to teach him how to hunt like I did… teach him how to live with humans, and on top of that have him learn to trust, learn to love…learn to be the Jasper that I know. I just had to believe that what we had was strong enough to hold us together, through every up and down we are forced over come. We could handle anything, as long as we were handling it together.

I knew the biggest challenge would be making him adapt to this new life style… I'm forcing him to leave everything he knows, and take me- a small, random, pixie like, mysterious woman- in, along with a new 'family'… Damn it Mary… you should have just told him earlier... before you got attached… before he danced with you… before he stole your heart…I knew I should have never allowed myself to follow my heart; it only brought me confusion… and eventually it could bring me the worst pain of all. I knew my heart was dead, never moving. But, that doesn't mean it couldn't break.

He would come back.

He has to come back.

….he left his hat here. I picked it up, and placed it on my head. It was much too large, and covered my face almost completely. But, it smelt like him. Jasper smelt like nature. The smell of fresh morning dew, the smell of rain, the light scent that was carried in the air around spring time, and in the early summer. It was magical. It was wonderful. And I craved to have myself surrounded by nothing other than his scent, no barriers. Just he and I. in our most natural form…not having to hide our true selves from the outside world.

I started to feel weak, and my head started spinning…not again….I knew what was coming. A vision… I couldn't avoid them. I couldn't decide if these visions were considered as a curse, or a gift. After all, my visions had shown me Jasper… But, sometimes I just wished I could be a normal…being. Well, as normal as a vampire could be. I had more than other people did, and I knew that someone out there craved what I so desperately wanted to dispose of. I knew that if I could I would switch lives with anyone in the blink of an eye…as long as Jasper was still with me. I don't remember a life without him, and I wasn't planning on giving him up any time soon. The colors in the room started fading to a light grey, then darker every millisecond as they turned into a dark black...and my future began.

_I was with Jasper… the sky was a soft pink mixed with simplest of all blues and perfect purples. We were walking down an empty dirt road, beside a wheat felid. The colors in the field contrasted with the sky, and the setting sun left a slight shine on the wheat, along with the beginnings of shadows. Our skin was glimmering in the slight light, showing off our vampiristic nature. Jasper was holding my hand, and he smiled lightly, letting his dimples show in the smallest way as he slowly lifted my hand to his excited lips, gently meeting the skin on my left ring finger. There was no ring there, but I knew the kiss was symbolic. A sign showing that I would soon be housing a ring of my own there. Jasper's lips were soft yet strong on my diamond hard skin. It was a complete contrast. Soft meeting strong. His kiss sent electric shocks through my dead heart, making my lips turn up in their own ecstatic smile of genuine love and trust. _

"_Jasper?" I pulled our hands back down to my side, still feeling the tenderness of his kiss on my cold skin _

"_Yes, my love?" He walked slightly to the left, distancing us. I did not enjoy the distance, but then Jasper spun me around in a circle, like they do in ballroom dancing. I had begun to love dancing, and Jazz and I danced together under the stars almost every night._

"_Are you glad you came back?" I stopped walking, and leaned into his chest; resting my head over his heart._

_He laughed lightly, and lifted my chin up gently to face him. "Of course Alice. I would always come back for you." He ran his fingers through my short spiky mess of dark auburn hair. Resting his hand on the back of my neck._

_Then, a blond figure ran towards us, her hair flowing behind her like the wheat was blowing in the wind. She was tall, and more beautiful than anyone I had ever seen. She was fast, yet graceful, like a gazelle. _

"_Rosie!" I yelled, and I ran towards her. "How was your honeymoon with Em?" _

_She smiled, "delightful." She winked to me, and turned to Jasper. "You best be coming home… Carlisle says he has news, and won't tell anyone aside from Esme until you are home. Edward is getting annoyed." She moved her hair over her shoulder letting the sun hit it, sending shimmers of gold around her, like an aura. _

_I laughed, and hooked arms with 'Rosie' as Jasper trailed behind us. We walked over to a large house, where a very handsome man greeted us. _

"_Rosalie! You found Alice and Jasper, excellent." The man smiled and gave Rose a pat on the head; she growled and placed a fake smile on her gorgeous face. "Edward, I would watch what you do, I might have to get Emmett to come after you." _

_Edward laughed, and came over to Jasper and I. "Well, I'm sure Jasper would be on my side… we could take him, couldn't we Jazz? And plus, Emmett is a big softy." He eyed Rosalie, who had turned to head outside, but heard his remarks and stopped dead in her tracks, annoyed with Edward._

_Jasper laughed. And looked at me. "I have better things to do than to fight Emmett." _

"_Rose, Ed, Jazz…behave yourselves. We have to go in, Carlisle has news…" I smiled, knowing the news myself already, having seen it in a vision. This was going to be interesting…and exciting._

_We all filtered into the house, and joined who I am guessing was Carlisle and Emmett at the table. There was another woman there; she had Carmel colored curls that framed her pretty heart shaped face. The woman gave us a warm smile, and seated herself beside Carlisle._

_Carlisle told us that we were to be moving to a new town. A very small town called Forks, in Washington._

"_Where?" was all Emmett said._

I woke up moments later, and the colors of the room slowly came back to me. I blinked a few times, and stood back up, moving over to sit down in the chair in the corner.

Now there were more questions to answer.

Where was I in the vision? Because wherever I was, The Cullen's were there.

When does Jasper come back? I knew he did come back for sure… I saw it. But, that doesn't mean he comes back today, or even tomorrow…

Another question to Answer… Why did they call me Alice? I knew my name was Mary… I had searched for years looking to discover who I was, and then one day I had a vision of Jasper calling me Mary Alice… it was in the diner. But, why do I change my name? I have grown so used to Mary Alice. Not that I didn't like Alice- because, I did- but, it was just another thing to have to deal with. Plus, my hair was short…very short... I love my hair the way it is now.

I knew I shouldn't be thinking about such petty things right now. All that mattered was Jasper. He was the prime factor of my future.

I looked over at the clock on the wall, and it read 5:27 am… had I really been out that long? I have never experienced a vision that long. Usually they only last for a matter of seconds…

What was happening to me?

I heard a soft rap at the door, and my entire body shivered… I slowly got up, and walked towards the door, fixing my now tangled hair as I did…

I opened the door, and everything fell back into place.


	6. My Personal Euphoria

**A/N Sorry it took soo long! I've been sooo busy! i hope you enjoy this chapter, it is my fav. out of all the chapters so far :P ;) **

Jasper was standing there, the light of the small unattractive lamp above his golden hair was shinning in my eyes, making his skin seem darker, and more golden than usual. I didn't mind, my eyes could see through the transparent film the light had placed over Jasper's completion; it was really just an annoyance.

He was looking down, his hair falling over his eyes, hiding his face to just above the tip of his perfectly angular nose. Jasper's hand flew up, and placed itself on the door frame, I flinched… I knew I shouldn't have been scared. But, Jasper was dangerous, and unpredictable. He could lash out at me at any minute. I looked over at his paper thin, rock hard skin and his hand twitched. It was subtle, and would have been un-noticeable and not seen to the un-trained human eye. I moved forward nervously, thinking to myself that something was wrong. What haven't I seen? I took in his stance, and he didn't seem angered, or sad, or hurt… just…alone. My lips turned up in the smallest of smiles; I was nervous that he would see my feeble smile and think I was glad about the fact that he was truly and deeply emotionally depressed… clinically and painfully damaged. I knew I was not making fun of him; I was more smiling in agreement, as I was just as vulnerable and lonesome as he.

Jasper's eyes were half visible through his curls of golden hair, and they were searching my face, reading my thoughts, feeling my emotions… I stood there, looking into his eyes, following them as he looked over my body, trying to get at what I was feeling. After he was content with what he had found (which was most likely pure joy, as he had come back to me), he returned my smile, and stood up straight, bringing his twitching hand off of the door frame, leaving a slight indentation.

He laughed gently as he saw the dent he had made, but when I added a laugh myself, he became deadly serious, and placed a grimace on his beautiful pale pink lips. He seriously looked like a god, a statue un-carvable by any famed artist. Too perfect to be compared to anything whether it be Da Vinci or Michael Angelo, Jasper was much too beautiful for their lack of know how.

I knew I was starring at his many perfections, and it was not very…lady like, but I could not find the mental strength, let alone the manners and decency to look away. I had to pull my eyes away before they were stuck like glue on his perfectly molded arms… Jasper cleared his throat, and swallowed hard, his Adams apple bobbing slightly in his throat… I didn't want to, and knew I would regret this later, but I looked away, finding my way to his eyes. His (literally) deep blood red eyes weren't as tortured as they were yesterday… nor were they as dark… he had hunted. Someone had died… I looked away momentarily, but could not keep my eyes away for long. Jasper looked happier, but not completely content. I smiled at him, trying to show it was okay, and he was safe with me. I knew he didn't trust me yet, but for him to be able to trust me, I had to encourage it. I was expecting a lot from him, and I wouldn't just one day beg for it, I had to work, and work hard for any glimmer of hope, any slim chances of trust.

"We have to talk…" his eyebrows creased inwards as he said this, making a little dent right above his nose… It was quite cute, but my attention was focused on the words of honey that were dripping off of his tongue.

The words stung me as I understood the meanings behind them… apparently the velvet honey that was his voice came with a round of bees thirsting for the blood of my heart… It wasn't any cliché that was about to occur… I would actually need to explain everything that I knew, explain how we became two copies of one same person in a matter of hours… He would stay, I could still see that… but, he would hurt as I told him. He would flinch as I explained what we were headed for, as I told him what I have gone through, he would have a film of water over his beautiful red eyes as I walked him down his own memory lane, pointing out faults that needed to be fixed… it would be hard, for both of us. But, it was necessary. I would ask the un-imaginable from this wild man, ask him to become trained, to become civilized… to become more human than he could ever need. Just to hide our nature. I knew I could do this. I had to find my inner strength. I had to sit him down and just say it. It was as easy as that… just say it. But, as the beautiful man walked into the plain room, my faith began to shake, and I lost the trust I had gained for myself… I wasn't scared of him, I was scared for him.

I moved to the side of the doorway, making space for him to enter. He passed by me, his torso brushed against my arm as he moved, and the fabric of his button up shirt grazed my shoulder, driving me crazy… it smelt like him… it was my personal euphoria. He never noticed the change in my emotions. Or maybe he did, but pushed them aside as he pushed away his own emotions, hiding them from no one but himself. He walked up and down my room, and left a trail of carpet that had been moved in a different direction from the rest of the old rug. I sat down slowly on the bed, watching him move.

We needed to talk, well… I needed to talk, and I would let nothing interfere until our talk was finished. But, something urged me to run. To get out of there now, before you ruin everything I had been waiting for…I so desperately wanted to skip over this horrible experience, and get right into being that happy (madly in love) couple I had seen hundreds of times in my visions… But, I knew I had no other option. So I turned slowly, facing him again. I sighed, and looked at my feet, begging them to take control of my brain and just move over to him. I begged my arms to allow me to wrap around him, holding myself close, hiding my face from the rest of the world.

Jasper's head snapped up, and he smiled at me. It wasn't a big heartfelt smile that I craved, but it was a light, a glimmer of hope. It was the push that I needed to move forward. The way his pale lips turned up in the corners gave him a little dimple on his left cheek. It was a goofy lopsided grin, but I loved it. His teeth were perfectly straight, and as white as clouds. I let my eyes wonder up to look into his beautiful eyes once again. The smile he had formed left his eyes shining, and staring at me with intensity so deep you could cut the tension in the room with a knife. I had to look away; it was too much, to overwhelming to take in this handsome expression all at once. My eyes fell to the floor, and I let out the smallest giggle, letting its sound ring in the open, cold air of the room. Something needed to be said… from anyone. By the patient expression I saw on Jasper's face I guessed I was suppose to begin this conversation so I took a deep breath in, letting his scent comfort me. I looked up, and began to walk over to him, taking one step at a time, stopping every other step to clear my mind. I could do this.

I opened my mouth and nothing came out. The words were jammed, stuck, and scrambled up on my tongue all trying to come out at the same time. I closed my mouth, and Jasper's eye brows rose, obviously questioning my small quantity of sanity. I gave him a nervous lopsided smile, and cleared my throat. Jasper took a step closer to me, reaching out for my arm. As he moved, his eye sent scorching flames into mine as he looked for acceptance and an 'okay' so to speak for him to touch me. I froze in my already cold skin and didn't make any movement… come on Mary Alice… you can do this, just nod your stupid little head, smile…or anything! Just let him touch you…. Jasper's arm retreated, and he shoved him hand into the pocket of his jeans, digging it in deep. I closed my eyes, and begged and pleaded for any strength. The words finally came, and I was ready to try this again.

I laughed, well scoffed, and moved my body so that I was directly in front of Jasper. "Jasper, you….you have to…" the words ran out of my mouth in an avalanche of failed explanation. I searched my mind for the right words. "You have to understand how…difficult this all is for me…" Jasper nodded and closed the distance between us, releasing his hands from his pockets, and letting them fall on my shoulders. "Darlin' I know how your feeling." He laughed, I understood the hiding meaning of his words, but I couldn't lose my concentration by laughing, or by thinking about how close he was to me, or even….what was I saying again?

He couldn't have understood. This was the hardest thing I had ever done… that I could remember at least. "No, no Jasper you don't…you can't…" I sighed. "You have no idea what you are saying." I shook my head, hoping he understood. "Mary, you are so convinced that I hate you…" he laughed, and his cool fingers glided down my trembling arm, as he held my diminutive hand in his own monstrous palms. I could feel the slight indentations and markings on his hands as they gently pulsed against mine, and he was strong and sure as he wrapped himself around my 'size challenged' fingers. My mouth moved faster than my brain, and I started spilling out everything that was on my mind, starting with the easiest of requests. "Call me Alice." The words ran out of my mouth, racing to see what could get to jasper's ears first. His eyes spoke for themselves as they questioned me; I looked down at the floor, hiding the embarrassment I had just gained from my random outburst. I nodded. "Okay," he smiled. "Alice, why are you so convinced that I hate you?" again, more verbal spit up. "I don't hate you Jasper, I could never hate you…I don't even think hate is in my vocabulary… well, except for Maria, I hate Maria…" I saw his eyes widen as I said this, and I realized what I had just dropped on him… time to explain.

"Alice…" he released my hand, and stretched out his fingers, as he moved to the bed, taking a seat on the plain duvet, he lowered his head, cradling it in his palms hiding his face. I wanted to sit beside him, and I wanted to comfort him, but yet again, my legs had failed me. "Jazz, I'm sorry," I raised my hand, reaching for him, but my hand fell as he shook his head. "I wasn't thinking. I didn't mean to say that Jasper. I'm just…" Jasper's once honey voice had turned into steel as he jumped up from the bed and raced over to me. "How do you know Maria?" he took my hands once again, I loved the way he felt, but I was too distracted by his words… so, I nodded quickly and waited for his response… I could visibly see the anger in his face, and hear it in his voice. I knew I should have just kept my mouth shut. Now I have ruined everything. He is mad at me… "Alice… I'm not mad at you," of course… I'm going to have to be careful with my stupid emotions around him, how could I forget. "I'm mad, yes, but not at all at you…" he pulled me closer to him, and flattened my long hair out with his other hand, resting it on the small of my back. I wonder if he felt the shiver that just ran up my spine. He looked hesitant, but continued. "She didn't… hurt you at all…did she?" He looked down at the floor, his anger being replaced by a sad grimace. He looked up slowly, and took in my body, checking for any visible marks that prove she had touched me. "Alice, you have to tell me if she touched you," he hugged me against his hard cold chest. He rested his chin slightly on my head. For the third time in the last few days, I swear I felt my heart scream in pleasure as he held me close. "I'll kill her if she did…" he murmured against my hair. I laughed; he still hadn't clicked in to how exactly I knew Maria.

"Jasper, I saw her in a vision… I'm okay, I'm fine. She didn't touch me." I could feel him smiling against my hair as I moved my tiny arms to place them around his waist, letting my head fall into the base of his collar bone. I was standing on my tippy toes, but it was the most comfortable and the most relaxed I had been in years. Yet, I knew it was the calm before the storm. "Oh, well in that case…" Jasper said as his arms reached down, and slid themselves around my waist. "You mind?" he asked me, a smile playing on the corners of his beautiful lips… I would do anything to see him smile. So, I agreed silently. But, I was never expecting what came next. Jasper picked me up; he picked me up as easy as if I was a 5 pound weight, and flung me over his shoulder, carrying me across the room. I screamed, but I covered my mouth with my hands, remembering I was still in a hotel. I gently kicked my legs, squirming, trying to make this as difficult as possible for him. Surprisingly, he held his own, and never let me slip an inch. I balled my hands up into tiny fists and slammed them against his back, still, no movement. 'Jasper Whitlock let me down now!" I demanded; letting the authority ring in my voice. "If you command ma'am." Jasper laughed, and soon I was falling. I landed with a bump on the bed, and I burst out into laughter, sitting up on my knees, fixing my dress and my hair as I mumbled unintelligibly to myself, but still continued laughing. Jasper began to laugh as well, and it made my heart swell. I looked up to see the most beautiful, most peaceful, most amazing smile of my life. I let my own compassionate smile grow as I crawled over to the edge of the bed. I grabbed Jasper by the waist and threw him down on the bed beside me.

Jasper rolled over, and began tickling my sides, it wouldn't normally have affected me, but the gesture was so cute, so human. I couldn't help but laugh. I reached out trying to tickle him back, but one of his huge hands held both of my own at once, and I was left completely defenseless as he attacked me. I growled playfully. And Jasper tickled me harder. He then stopped, and rolled us over so I was lying on top of him. "You know," he said as he moved a stray strand of my hair, tucking it behind my gleeful face. "this isn't going to get you out of explaining anything lil' misses."

**Tell me what you think! if you have any ideas, im open for suggestion :P don't worry, first kisses, first nights, first proposal, first meeting with the Cullen's and all that fun stuff is coming soon!**

**P.S JASPER LOVES YOU!... he also happens to be a big fan of reviews ;)**


	7. LIving in the Moment

**And here it is! the new chapter :P :) ugh, this took me hours. so be thankful. ;) lol we are getting close to some big moments in Alice and Jasper's life... :P **

**well, i dont own twilight (sadly) and Alice and Jazz arent my creations (double sadly) **

**but, all in all, **

**here you go.

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** A**lice's winsome, incandescent, beaming-yet slightly impish and malevolent smile faded quickly into a harsh line that made her perfect skin crease into tiny lines shadowing her mouth. She rolled off of me, and I felt coldness inside my heart. I yearned for her closeness. She moved elegantly to the edge of the bed, letting her legs dangle and kick the covers.

Alice's bubbly, happy voice had become timid, and nervous, "Alright, my turn to speak." Her little head turned to face me, and she was biting her bright red lips. I scooted to her side, using my power to bring her a sense of calm. It wouldn't be much, but I wanted to help her in any way possible. As I landed at her side, Alice reached for me, and grabbed my right arm, pulling it over to her, dragging me along with it. As I was getting closer, I saw Alice's scared eyes turn lighter, and her smile began creeping around the corners of her fairytale lips. I pulled my arm free from her, and as quickly as possible, I placed it back on her waist, pulling her up on to my lap. Screw holding back, I give up. I wanted Alice close, and I would hold her as long as I wanted. Give her whatever she craved. I would make this angel happy, no matter what it took. Alice was my savior; I owed her anything and everything. The least I could do was giving her the comfort of my touch. Her tiny frame folded into the shape of my body, and her knees came up, as she cradled herself into a comfortable position in my arms. Alice's head was lying on my shoulder, and as I wrapped my arms tighter around her, hugging her close, smelling her invigorating scent (cinnamon and French vanilla) she laughed, and I felt the vibrations of voice on my skin.

The little angel I was holding came to life as she traced my scars, making patterns with her fingernails on my rock hard skin. Her skin was ice cold, but as hot as burning coals at the same time. It made me ache, it made me scream internally. It hit me hard, and I had never felt a need this strong since I was first changed.

_ The three women were beautiful, more graceful than I had ever seen. They drew me in, and as I got closer they just seemed to get more beautiful. There was a blonde, and two brunettes. The shorter brunette was by far the most beautiful, and had positioned herself I n front, obviously the leader. I went to give them my aid, prove myself worthy for their protection._

"Jazz, you were hurt, weren't you? It might not have been physically, but you were…in pain." Alice cringed as she spoke, and I held her, just begging that this comfort was enough for her. This was hurting her, and her pain was seeping into my core, making me want to burst out into a crying fit, and throw a tantrum, it made me want to cover my ears and make her stop. I knew it hurt her, but I knew where she was heading, and things were bound to get worse. She attempted to hide her pain, and continued speaking. "That day, when you met-

"_Maria." The 'leader' of the women spoke as she walked forward to greet me, I pulled my horse along beside me, but the blonde girl grabbed the reins from my hand, and petted the stallion gently. The taller of the brunettes walked forward and whispered lightly in Maria's ear. I could not hear what she was saying, but the devilish smile on her face made me feel as though these girls weren't as sweet as they appeared. "What is your name?" Maria asked me. Her voice was dipped in a Mexican accent, but the color of her skin suggested otherwise. "Major Jasper Whitlock Ma'am." I took off my hat- out of reflex-and I slightly nodded my head towards the beautiful woman. I felt myself shiver as the ice cold skin of the blonde woman tickled my skin. She stopped behind Maria, and spoke in the softest voice I had ever heard. "A major? Nice…you better do it Maria, I can never stop once I start." She smiled, and her bright white teeth had a slight tint of red on them… my heart pounded. I was not safe. My instincts told me to run, but my heart begged and pleaded to stay. "Yes, do it now Maria." The other of the woman pleaded as Maria stalked forwards. I began to sweat as I noticed the color of her eyes…blood red. She was no normal human; she did not need my help… I must get away, I must run! But, I couldn't move. I was hypnotized by her beauty…the way she moved, her scent… "I do hope you will survive Major, you shall be of great use to me…" Maria smiled, and I took a small step backwards, scared of her words. Her hands grabbed my wrists, and I tried to pull away, but Maria was holding me there, her strength more accumulated than any wild animal. She slowly tilted her chin upwards, as if to kiss me, and then let go of my hand, as she ran her thin fingers threw my hair… I was captivated… it all moved so quickly from there. One moment I was being held by Maria, and the next I felt her teeth sink in to my skin as I bellowed in pain. _

Maria, you had gotten a notice, hadn't you?" my mind unfocused from my little Alice, and refocused on a cloudy memory from my past…Yes, I had gotten a notice…it was the best moment of my life. I had been deemed as off duty for the weekend, to go see my mother, because she was ill. I had seen her a month earlier, and that last visit had gone…not as expected. I had been talked to again, because of my lack of marital status. My mother had ended the visit by shoving her grandmother's wedding ring in my front pocket. Now, as I remember this, it seems foolish. Yet, I could feel the ring burning in my pocket, from where it has never left. This visit was to be a goodbye visit…she was to be dead within weeks. I nodded; I felt the sting of water flash over my eyes… "To see my mother." My voice was stuck in my throat and I had to force it out, but it scrapped my mouth as it did. "Jasper, I have seen you get that notice, I have seen you with pain in your eyes as you read in the news about your mother's death, I was there Jasper…I just wasn't visible."

Her words hit me like a punch in the face- you don't feel the pain at first, but as soon as the contact is over, you feel the instant and throbbing sting. She saw me at my weakest, she has seen me in my worst…how is she sitting here? How is she possibly trusting me?

"What else did you see Alice?" I rubbed her shoulder as I said this. I wanted every piece of information I could.

"I saw you after Maria changed you…I know how Maria left you when you were screaming in agony, how they left you there…unwatched, unprotected." She turned in my lap so that she was facing me, her legs straddling my own. I remembered the

_Pain. _

_Torture. _

_Agony. _

_Horror. _

_Please, kill me. _

_No one deserves this._

Pain, I could remember waking up, surrounded by Maria, and her evil delinquents. Of course, I saw it different at the time; Maria was beautiful. I was in a trance. It was the most powerful infatuation in the existence of mankind. I wondered if Maria had felt it too, and I believed she had when she made me second in command.

_Burning. _

_ I can scream and scream, but the pain will not cower. I am stuck in this nightmare. No escape. You'd expect a searing pain to subside eventually, to turn into a dull sting, but this burning got stronger and stronger as I shook and scram and yelled and pleaded to be killed. _

"The visions stopped for awhile, and I only saw you a few more times before I met you two days ago." Her voice raised an octave as she reached the end. I could feel the unease washing off of her. What was she hiding?

"Alice, what are you not telling me?" I lifted her chin up so I could look in her golden eyes, begging her for answers.

"I saw one other vision… it was the day you met Charlotte." She cringed, and I understood why. I could remember

"_Peter!" I yelled across the room. I knew damn well that he could hear me, but his behavior was in excusable. Peter looked up from the small girl, and gave me a small smile. "Jasper…I beg of you…not her." He helped the young girl up, and she took cover behind him, hiding her face from me. I could feel their emotions… it was sickening. I wanted right then to rip her petite little head off of her shoulders and throw it into the accumulating pile. _

"_Brother please," Peter approached me. "Save her." He smiled. "I'll leave, I'll get her out of her; I'd come back for you." I ignored him and sauntered over to a weak male vampire. I picked him up by his foot as he struggled, kicking and screaming and lashing out, trying to bite me. Foolish man, I was much stronger than he. I could feel his pain, his worry, and his horror as I reached around his back and grabbed on to the side of his neck. With a twist of my wrist, his neck snapped, and his head was on the ground below me. I looked up, seeing Peter with his mate, Charlotte. She was frightened. She shook as Peter held her closely, as far away from me as possible. _

"_You cannot save her, peter. Maria is in charge, not I." I growled as I walked forwards. _

"_What Maria doesn't know won't hurt her." Peter smiled weakly and pushed Charlotte behind him._

_ I laughed darkly. "But, she will know." I smiled, and stopped walking. _

_ Peters voice cracked, and her cleared his throat, defending his love. "Jasper, look into my eyes, you feel what I'm feeling… isn't it amazing? He reached back for Charlotte's hand. I laughed, "Amazing?" I rolled my eyes, and made my way over to my next victim. Peter moved in front of the woman. _

"_Jasper, listen to yourself." Peter grabbed my arm and my anger flared. I pushed him aside, and grabbed the woman, killing her quickly. Charlotte let out a sob and I turned to her. _

"_What do you want?" I said, moving towards her. Peter grabbed her hand from behind and forced her back to his side. _

"_Jasper," charlotte began. "Jasper please. I will personally take the blame. I know you don't know what I'm feeling, haven't experienced it for yourself…but if you let us go…we will come back for you." She smiled and walked forwards. _

"_Charlotte, I can't." My words were stuck in my throat, and I turned away from them, hiding my shame. I wanted to but I couldn't. _

"_But you can Jasper." Her tiny little voice grew strong, and I could hear her feet moving across the floor. Something touched my shoulder, and I instinctively turned around, prepared to attack. Charlotte's face was completely smooth and relaxed. I began to calm down as she spoke again, "Just don't stop us. Don't do anything." She smiled. _

_ I turned around, and walked in the direction of my next 'job'. I heard no movement from across the room, and I waited for them to catch on that this was their chance… after a few moments of silence I turned, and my only friend in the world had disappeared. _

"I've changed Alice." I held her eyes on mine, and gave her a small smile, "You have changed me." I said this as I rested my forehead on hers. This moment was absolutely perfect.

Her eyes darted away from mine, and she looked down at her hands. "I know you have changed, but that won't erase what has already been done…"

And, it comes back…again. The pain, the misery…The self hatred. I hung my head in shame. "I know."

"Not that I care…" Alice said happily. Her tiny fingers grabbed my chin and lifted my face to meet hers. "You have to hear what I'm saying Jasper." She forced a tiny pout on her lips. "I. Don't. Care." She smiled. "I don't know any different Jazz. I know you. You are my only friend, and I don't care how many people you have so carelessly murdered. I don't care if you were a monster! I don't care if you were the devil himself," she pulled herself closer to me, her chest touching my own. Her arms slid around my neck and our faces were inches apart. "What's important is that you aren't anymore; and you never will be. This is the Jasper that you are, and always have been." Her right hand slid up from my neck, and tangled itself in my hair. "You can't possibly want this…" my voice was deep and husky; it was coated in pain, and served with a side of cold undead shame. She giggled, and ruffled my hair. "I can prove you wrong there Jazz. You may have hurt people, but you will never hurt me," her eyes closed slightly. "I'm sure of it. The past is done, and the future is never definite," she giggled softly as she said this. "So live in the moment…and in this moment…" she let her left hand join her right on the top of my head. "I want you…as is. Every scar, every crack, every dent…I want it all."

How is this possible? How am I not running? She knows about my every scar, and she isn't afraid? I should be nervous in her presence... well, I am. But, it's a different nervous. I want to make her happy; and I'm nervous that I won't succeed.

But, I want her as much as she wants me. That giggle, her tiny hands… her huge heart. Her whimsical voice… her bright red lips… this woman is all I will ever need.

Now…how do I tell her?

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**A/N what did you think**

**?**

**please tell me... you know, i need to know these things :P :)  
**


	8. Promise me?

**WELL! here you go! **

**part one of two of the most AMAZING moments in Jasper's life ;) **

**take a wild guess of what happens :P **

**just by the way, im going away for a bit in augest... but i will write a few more chapters :P and i'll write everyonce in awhile in augest, but it wont be as much :( :( **

**sadly, i own nothing :( **

**EXCEPT! for this story ;)**

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**JPOV**

"Alice, I need to tell you something Darlin'" I smiled at her new nickname. It fit her perfectly. She was a darling, sweet girl. And to top it off, she was mine.

Alice's smile grew in that instant, but was soon replaced by a sad grimace.

"But I have to tell you so much more…" she pleaded for me to understand. "It can wait," I smiled, and made sure to let it reach my eyes, showing her how truly happy I was. "Plus, I know my past, I can learn yours any day…we do have forever after all; but, this, on the other hand, can't wait." I raised my eyebrows as she massaged my head and brought her hands down to my face. I let my hands move from her shoulders, and I slowly gouged her reaction as I moved my eager hands to her back, curling her hair through my fingers as I did.

My confidence level raised as Alice pushed herself closer to my body, and her tiny head rested on top of mine, letting her lips graze over my blonde curls. "Tell me…" she crooned. I reluctantly pulled her down to meet my face; as I looked in her golden eyes I saw a sweet glimmer of everything I craved, everything I wanted.

Hope, trust, companionship, reason…love.

All of my needs can be summed up into one word; Alice.

My voice started out very small. "Mary Alice Brandon…" I halted to look into her eyes for another burst of sunshine.

"Yes?" she smiled. The odds were that she already knew what was coming…it didn't calm me down though. I'm committing to trust, and I'm scared. I knew what I was feeling, and it was not even close to how peter and charlotte felt that day… it was better. I…I loved her.

"I think," her eyes widened. "You think or you know?" her gleeful voice taunted me, but I knew the answer already, so I just had to convince her, not myself. "Know." I nodded. My insides felt invaded by a fluttering, the same fluttering I felt the moment I met her.

Her voice was high and sing song as she spoke, "Jasper, what do you know?"

I couldn't hold it in any longer, the suspense was too much.

"Mary Alice Brandon, I love you."

**APOV**

They say that before you die, you have a flashback of your entire life. Apparently, it occurs when you are overjoyed as well. As I sat there waiting for Jasper to speak the words I so desperately craved I remembered every moment, every hunt, every vision…

His eyes grew wide as his nervous fingers grabbed at the fabric of my dress, forcing me closer to him. He still wasn't speaking, so I forced the words into his mouth.

"Jasper, what do you know?" I could hear the excitement in my voice as I spoke…any second now…my six favorite words escaped his mouth…

"Mary Alice Brandon, I love you."

Then my emotions took control.

**J POV**

I never broke Alice and I's stare as I said my new favorite words, I was strong, confidant, and sure as I spoke, which I never expected to be. It was so different with Alice, every word came naturally. Nothing was forced.

I had said it. I, Jasper Whitlock had learned to trust, learned to _love._ Well, to an extent. I loved one, and only that one precious, captivating, talkative, marvelous, delightful, charming, delicate, and remarkable pixie could hold my heart…forever.

Alice's eyes soulful eyes were wide and locked on my mouth as I spoke, her hands fell down from my face to land on the collar of my shirt, tugging at the fabric; her fingers were as strong and sure as my words. Her beaming smile had turned into a smaller smile that put my heart on overdrive. The expression on her face was no less than seductive. Her eyebrows rose slightly, and her alabaster skin had started glowing from the light that was oozing into the room. Alice's emotions were wild. A mix of joy, contentment, nervousness, ecstasy, love, and coating each emotion was a sprinkle of lust.

This was the happiest moment of my life. Forget Maria, Peter? Charlotte? Who were they again? My life was Alice. And only Alice. I had always known my heart was dead, known I was technically dead. But, the moment I saw Alice in that diner, I was alive; but, in this instant, when I realized her feelings were mutual; my life took an unexpected turn. I was committed. She loved me too.

She actually loved me.

Loved _me_?

Mary Alice Brandon loved _ME_, Jasper Lee Whitlock.

I knew it was immature, I knew it was thinking far ahead but I wanted to hear how it sounded, and it was too tempting-

Alice Whitlock.

Mr. and Mrs. Jasper Whitlock

Mrs. Mary Alice Whitlock.

I just couldn't get enough of this.

Alice and Jasper Whitlock…

This was appalling. I loved her. I wanted to shout it from the rooftops, run around town, stopping random people on the streets and showing them. Showing them how beautiful she was, showing them how she smiled at me. Telling them that she loved me. And, letting them bask in her glory. Letting them drown in her words, watching their eyes widen as they laughed. I wanted them to see the true amazement that was Alice Brandon. I wanted to show them, and then laugh at them, knowing that she loved me! ME!

I had to say it again.

"I love you Alice." My voice dripped out of my mouth, I was intoxicated, drunk. Alice pulled me into a hug, her tiny fingers twisting in my hair, pulling my head closer to her. She let of a light, her personal aura was glowing, and she shined. My arms wrapped around her back easily, and I let one hand sit on her hip while my other went flying to the top of her own head, holding it on my chest, over my heart. I let my fingers slowly run through her luscious hair. Her hand left my head, and put it on the back of my neck, twitching with excitement, and it sent an electrical current trough my dead veins, shocking each part of my body separately, finally reaching my heart. A tiny giggle escaped Alice's lips and it creped louder and louder, turning into a full hearted, hearty, lovely laugh. I began to laugh as well, but the sound was not as gorgeous, wonderful, and sexy. It was more of a laugh of disbelief. Was this really happening?

My head dropped, falling on a soft cushion of My_ LOVE'S_ hair. Her invigorating scent drew me in, and I slowly let my lips reach the tiny amount of frizz that was on the top of her hair. I bent my neck, and let my lips slowly descend on her head. When they met her hair, my eyes widened, this was unreal. The taste of her on my lips was un-describable. She tasted of all the things I loved. Chocolate, a beautiful array of flowers, and vanilla… Along with cinnamon; it made my lips tingle, and tickle. I moved my lips to her ear, muttering of my love.

"Guess what?" I let out a small breath, and I noticed how she trembled from my cold breath hitting her 'warm' skin. "What?" her voice was muffled by the crumbled, creased fabric of my shirt that she was holding in her balled up fists, holding it to her face. I longed to look into her burning eyes, but my mouth stayed at her ear, whispering to her. "Mary Alice Brandon," I could feel her nodding her head on my chest, hearing the mumbled 'yes' escape her lips, I continued excitedly. "I love you, I will always love you," my smile continuously got larger and larger as I spoke, my words rolling off my tongue. "You are an angel and I just…" I couldn't think. "Alice, you are just…" ah, that's the word. "You are mine. And, I think you deserve to know that," did that sound too possessive? "By that I mean I'm here for you. I'll be behind every decision you make, and I will never ever," I smiled, and leaned in closer to her ear "_EVER _say no to you. Your wish is my command." Before the words were even finished coming out of my mouth, Alice had pushed herself off of me, and was smiling full force, her eyes dancing with excitement. She let out a tiny squeal, and shuffled backwards, pushing herself off the bed. Her hands left my shirt, and she firmly placed them on her hips. She wiggled her perfectly molded eyebrows, and gave me a soft smile. As she smiled, her bottom lip moved forwards, sticking out a bit, Then, Alice's beautiful eyes widened, and she batted her long eyelashes, filling her cheeks with air slightly.

What was she doing to me? I swallowed the nonexistent air in my mouth, and let out a sharp breath. I was hypnotized… what did she want? If she wanted it- hell! It was hers. That look was as bright as the sun, as magical as any fairy tale princess, and as alluring as the sweetest perfume. I had to fight my sudden urge to crush her tiny frame against mine; I grabbed the covers on the bed, anchoring myself there. She let out a heavy sigh, and the taste of her breath traveled across the small distance between us, hitting me as hard as a train.

Her voice sounded light and fluffy as she spoke. "Well," she batted her eyelashes again, realizing her complete control over her. "There is one thing…" her voice drew out, and she said her words slowly. It was sexy and completely adorable at the same time. I reached out for her, and grabbed the hem of her skirt, giving into the need. I pulled her close, and her thighs hit the top of my knees with force. Her hands moved seductively to my neck, and her fingers intertwined behind my ears. "Anything for you Darlin'" I gave her a tiny wink, and she realized she had won the battle-quite easily I must add, there was no competition.

With strength, Alice pushed me backwards, down on to the bed. I kept my grasp on her, so she followed me down, and landed lightly on my chest. Her full lips parted slightly, and she let out a tiny gasp, I had made it past her 'gift' with much success. I just had to be un-expected, not predictable, and sporadic.

"what did you want Darlin'?" I wanted her to remember, I was eager to fulfill her first wish.

She bit her bottom lip, and I felt a wave of nervousness and anxiety coming from her… what could she possibly be nervous about? I looked into her eyes, and gave her a reassuring smile, moving my hands to the small of her back. She took in a deep breath of air, and leaned in, inch by inch…

No. I couldn't…

Her lips were under a centimeter from mine, could I do it?

Would I do it?

I had to decide…and fast. I loved her, I knew I would have her forever… but, that wasn't enough. This was wrong on so many levels.

"Stop." The word rushed out of my mouth before I could think of the pain and rejection she felt. She sat up, and her jaw dropped, her eyes were wide, and she seemed shock, she didn't believe me. "But...But, I...I, I saw…" she shook her head side to side, what had she seen? "You kissed me!" she turned to face me, her eyes no longer sweet and innocent, but clouded by confusion, and anger. I was starting to let her emotions in… they were filling my senses. But, the lust I felt was stronger. I knew I couldn't. And I wouldn't. But, god…god, I wanted too.

"Promise me." I looked at the floor, and when her hand touched my shoulder I nodded, letting my quiet voice repeat itself. "Promise…" the corner of my mouth twitched, and Alice sighed. "I'm sorry Jasper…"

Rejection.

Her voice came out quickly and her words flew elegantly, as rushed as they were. " Jasper, im sorry, I wasn't thinking…I shouldn't have-

"Promise me!" my eyes met hers, and I begged her, I was just about ready to get down on my knees and gravel at her feet. I sent out a silent plead, and gave her a small smile.

"Jasper…" her voice was stuck in her throat, she gasper for air. And her tiny fingers traced the side of my face.

"Just. Say. It," I tangled my fingers in her hair, pulling it lightly. "Just say the words Alice. Promise me…and I'm yours." Her body wrapped around me, as she held me in her tight embrace. I felt her tiny head moving on my shoulder, but I wasn't sure if it was a yes or a no. "_SAY _it." My voice was forceful.

She gasped as she pulled her head off of my shoulder; both of her hands were now cradling my face. She gave me a small smile, but I could sense her bliss, her wonderment.

"Jasper Whitlock…" she leaned in, our foreheads touching. "I promise you." I let out a sigh of relief. "What do you promise me?" I laughed lightly. Now, I was teasing.

"I promise! I'll promise you anything. I'll be here forever. Okay? I am," she paused. "_IM_ yours!" Her last words fell out of her mouth, almost hanging on her tongue; she sighed slowly, biting her bottom lip, and letting her giggle seep through the corners of her lips.

She was mine. I wanted to happy dance! I was ecstatic! The beautiful little creature I held was mine, and she would always be mine...50 years ago, I would have never guessed that I would have met the girl of my dreams, and had fallen in love in such a small amount of time. But, I didn't care. I felt the medal of my grandmother's ring burning through the fabric of my pants… I moved my hand to feel the lump in my pocket. I smiled inwardly. Not tonight.

I raised my eyebrows, and moved my face closer to her own, our lips inches apart, begging for the touch of the other. My eyes shut softly, and I smiled lightly. I cupped her beautiful face with my left hand, and moved my right hand to under her chin, pushing her up to meet my hungry lips.

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**A/N**

**SOOOO WHAT DID YOU THINK?  
**

**HAHAHA  
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**TRICKED YOU ;) **

**NO KISSY KISSY YET!  
**

**next time ;)**

**I LOVE YOU 3**


	9. Not Tonight

**So...uhm... well, its 3:37 AM here, and i just wrote this...so you can understand why its so... interesting :) :) **

**i hope you like it!**

**here it is, **

**FINALLY ;) **

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The color of Alice's lips matched the taste. Our lips were barely touching, and yet the taste of the ripest strawberries had erupted in my mouth. I starved for more. Alice's eyelashes tickled my skin, and as I moved forwards, our lips crushed together clumsily. Her lips were soft, and full, yet strong. My lips molded around the shape of hers. I was greedy, I needed more. Our hands hit each others as we both made a hasty race to touch the other. Alice's fingers tickled the back of my neck, pulling at my rock hard skin. I pulled at her hair, tangling my individual fingers into different locks of hair.

Alice pulled back quickly, and my eyes shot open, what did I do? Her eyes were searching my face, and she sighed, completely content with herself.

I laughed. 'Darlin' I wasn't finished." I let my southern accent coat my words. She giggled, and moved closer to me. I grabbed her by the waist, and pulled her up into my lap, setting her there. She pushed me backwards, this time making sure she was directly on top of me…not that I didn't encourage her actions. Her fingers were fast and moved flawlessly, over my arms, resting on my collarbone; then moving slowly up my neck. She raised my head up to meet hers, and I was slowly drawn back into heaven by the taste of her lips.

I could feel Alice smiling against my lips, and it tickled; making me let out a muffled laugh. She wiggled her toes, and I could feel the electricity she created in my legs. I dragged her down so I was lying down on the feather pillow behind me. My eager hands moved to her back, pushing her tighter against me. I took my right index finger and slowly traced it up her spine and I watched (felt) her quiver as I did. Alice grabbed on to my shirt, and pulled me to the right, flipping us over, so that I was on top of her. She looked so small, so tiny so delicate. I was scared to touch her. I held myself up, keeping my body inches off of her own.

Alice lifted her head off of the pillow, wrapping her arms around my neck. Her lips met mine, but she pulled me down quickly as she distracted me. "I'm…," she kissed my nose. "Not…," she kissed my forehead "that…," she kissed me just beside my lips. "Breakable." She forced her lips on mine with so much strength, so much intensity… it was amazing. Alice was an amazing, strong, independent woman, and she was mine. She had found the soft, warm Jasper behind the brick wall I had been using for coverage. She parted her lips slightly, and I could feel the sting of her ice cold breath on my lips. Why she was bothering with breathing, I don't know. But, the sting itself was a high.

I'm thirsty, but not for blood.

I'm hungry.

I'm starving.

I'm _RAVENOUS._

Alice smiled, and let out a soft giggle, followed by a rush of un-understandable words. It sounded more like she was drowning then speaking. I could feel the hard skin of her forehead crease as she spoke, and I burst out in a fit of laughter, attempting to keep my lips touching hers as I did. I copied her mumble, tickling her lips. Alice smiled, and hit me on the back of the head playfully. I let my own lips open slightly, and Alice gasped, breathing in quickly, tasting me. I could feel her shiver, and I giggled. I gave her one small kiss, and then pulled back, moving her hair off of her face. "You cold darlin'?" I smiled, my words sounded lulled, and they were long and didn't make very much sense. Alice raised one dainty eyebrow, and shook her head. "Nope," she pulled her face up to mine. "On the contrary…" she smiled, and moved her lips to my ear, kissing it softly. "I'm very warm." She giggled, and gently bit the top of my ear, tugging on it slightly. I smiled, and moved her so that she was below me again. "Well, that's not good. We don't want you overheating…" I let out a soft laugh, and she smiled bit her lip, but her emotions were far from nervous. She rolled her eyes, and propped herself up on her elbows, letting her lips trail across the skin of my collarbone, reaching up to my collar with her hands, gently pulling me down as she kissed a scar on the side of my neck.

Alice's greedy little fingers slowly made their way down to the top of my shirt, and I let her rip off the top button without thinking, or considering what she was thinking, what she was feeling. I rolled us over, and Alice's eyes were on fire, the gold turning darker, and changing to an ember color, looking into my soul. I felt the cold skin of her finger trace my scars below my collarbone, and when it landed at the next button of my shirt, she looked up at my face, and I smiled, raising an eyebrow. The feeling of her lips on my skin was amazing, how was I supposed to say no?

With an Impish smile on her lips, Alice quickly tugged her finger down, ripping every button off of my shirt in her wild haste for more skin. Her bright eyes widened at the sight of my scars, and I cringed… this was the part I dreaded. A smile creped onto her perfect face, and my worry was pushed aside, and filled with the love and acceptance Alice had sent my way. She moved a piece of hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. She licked her tiny lips, and smiled as she lowered her head, kissing the first scar she could see on my damaged skin.

Her lips were magic, as she kissed scar after scar, it felt as though she was gluing me back together, piece by piece, making me whole again. Hiding my battle scars from the world. She slowly made her way down my chest, giving each scar a kiss, smiling after each scar had been given attention. I was suddenly aware of Alice's hidden motives. She had begun to kiss the skin just below my bellybutton, and I was internally screaming.

My heart begged for me to continue; as did the burning fire in my soul.

But I couldn't.

I watched as Alice's eyes clouded over, and her vision became un-focused. I was about to panic when the realization hit me that she was having a vision. The fire was aching throughout my body, burning my skin, craving to be touched.

Alice blinked a few times, and rested her chin on my chest, giving me a sad smile, but she understood. I let my head fall back, resting it on the headboard, and I felt Alice crawling back up to me, curling into my side.

"I'm sorry Alice…" I still couldn't look into her horribly sad eyes. "I really want to...I just…cant." I gained confidence from her touch, and looked her in the eyes. She wasn't as sad as I expected… she was calm, and her eyes were full of joy, just as much as earlier.

"I know you want to Jazz…" she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and let out a heart shuttering laugh.

"You understand why I can't take anything anywhere tonight, right?" Now I was the one biting my lip. I wanted to. And I hated myself for saying no, but it was the right thing to do.

Alice nodded her little head, and her tiny hand reached out, touching my chest (over my heart) "I understand." She smiled devilishly, and I tilted my head, silently questioningly her actions. She smiled, and moved her hand from my chest to my leg, down to my pocket, where her tiny fingers closed on the burning metal of my grandmother's ring. "There are things that have to be done first." My eyes widened, and the size of my heart grew… she wanted the ring…it was hers. It was truly and rightfully hers. I would give it to her, right now. But, she was right. Not tonight.

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**BAM! sorry for the KINDA lack of a cliffy :P**


	10. Engraved Forevermore

The world truly is a wonderful place when you realize you aren't alone. Spending four hours with the beautiful girl beside me, and I understood the meaning of life; to live for her. The way her pale tiny fingers would gently navigate to the side of her face, moving a piece of her outstanding, brilliant black hair and placing it gently behind her dainty ears, revealing the eyes I have surrendered to. Her eye lashes were the hand carved frame to the priceless artwork before me. The color of her eye was unique, nothing I had ever seen. But, it was not un-expected considering these eyes belonged to Alice. They shinned a bright gold, contrasted with light grays and mahogany browns, her eyes seemed to go forever, getting slightly darker the closer it got to her pupil. The dark charcoal that surrounded her pupil reminded me of art in itself, it was the lead of a pencil, the imagination's form of communication. It was not simply how beautiful the coloring of her eyes was, but more of how her eyes talked. They screamed. You take one look into her wide, trusting eyes and you see a young soul…somehow lost, tortured. You double take, and look back. But the scared child-like gleam in her eyes is replaced with genuine devotion. Her eyes mirror the smile on her porcelain face, the same smile that is also copied in my heart, engraved forevermore.


	11. Jigsaw Puzzle

Scars mulled every square inch of his rock hard skin. I couldn't decide whether I was okay with the fact that those scars were going to be there forever…a constant reminder, telling him repeatedly how much pain and suffering he has gone through. I knew he was my angel, my savior; but he was broken. A jigsaw puzzle improperly glued back together…I was going to be the one doing the fixing from here on in. I would piece my love back together, starting at his toes and ending at his heart. I may not be able to take away the memories, but I can replace them. Jasper had survived through everything just to get to me. It was fate. Why him? Why did Maria save him? How did he get free? I know how. Me. He had to find me. Were both broken, shattered bits and smashed fragments of real people and together we make a complete puzzle, one complete person, one heart. So as I let my fingers lazily trace the dent and contours on his muscular arms I remind myself…this is only the beginning. These scars represent what was. This moment, right here, right now, represents what is, what will be. Scars or no scars…I love him.


End file.
